Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Are you a Good listener??

Are you a good listener?
Are you a good counselor?
Yup, this is a topics for my blog today.
I believe, that's you all sure have experiences became a listener to your friends, your siblings, your family.
especially when your friends was down,they were facing problems,or stress as exam or relationship problem with someone/ beloved.
or, be a listener to your siblings when they are facing problem such as education problems and financial problem,usually.


Then, Do you think you are a good listener? do you think you are suitable to become a listener for your friends or anyone? what you should do or what you cannot do for them?


I search for Google, a good listener: 
"Listening is an essential part of communication, and it is different from hearing. Being a good and patient listener helps you not only solve many problems at work or home, but also to see the world through the eyes of others, thereby opening your understanding and enhancing your capacity for empathy. In addition, you learn a lot from listening. As simple as listening to and acknowledging other people may seem, doing it well, particularly when disagreements arise, takes sincere effort and lots of practice."


Yup, It is totally correct.
but how to become a good listener?
To be a good listener, you must contains a lot of knowledge and information.Always updating your knowledge and information is necessary, you can improved from daily reading,this is a good way to made you knowledgeable.Or just based on your own experiences,this is allowable to made your opinion raised and helpful, but the most important is,its must be correct and good way although its your theory.
During the process of listening for your friends, what you need to do is, do a well observation within your sensitive mind thinking to distinguish, analysis, guessing and resulting what the patient talk and information based on your knowledge or experience.
What to distinguish : to distinguish is it the information or view or theory from that patient is correct,normal or acceptable.
What to analysis : to analysis the information from the patients. From the information, you need to understand what is their goal, what is their point, what is their target from/to the events happened.
What to guessing : to guess the feeling, thinking, opinion of the patient now, and try to guess what was their feeling, thinking and action during the events they mention to. So, your guessing is based on your sensitive but need to make sure,IS IT YOUR SENSITIVE GUESSING IS CORRECT,if not, you will be totally failed in this help.
What to result : result,is mean make a short conclusion for your-self and for your patient. Resulting the information from talker, and make conclusion for your-self, REMEMBER, it just for your-self. What meaning of conclusion for your-self, that is mean to simplify the information and the Value of the patient from you, but, PLEASE, do not given any opinion from you to your patient, its WRONG!!!. then what is mean result for patient, actually, it just need to make sure your patient is really open-mind with you and totally believe at you,and it can make them they are comfortable with the process and comfortable after the talk.


and what action or respond you need between the partner and listener are/recognized a good listener:
* good listener is fully present with patient
* good listener will keep eyes contact with patient
* good listener will nod, smile and give you autidory feedback
* good listener will always allow you continue to talk
* good listener will parrot back what you are saying when appropiate
* good listener will only finish your sentences when appropiate
* good listener will goes by 80% listening and 20% talking rule
* good listener will keep focus on your topics till end
* good listener know how to empathize you.




Besides that , be a good listener:
* you must remember all the information from your patients, its important to every step.
* you must always observe at them, try to help
* you can not given your own opinion.
* you must keep secrete totally, its privacy right for your patient, dun make them no believe you.
* you can not effect your mood and thinking by the patient talk and information, if not, you are a totally failed   listener, and not suitable be a listener.Listener, must be strong. For example, you patient talk you he/she is break up with their beloved. then, after the that, you are asking to your-self, why I'm still single?!  its not allow to be emotional.
* you must always thinking positive
* you must always confident.


Okie, always be a good listener/counselor to people around you.
p/s: that information from what I learn when I was a PRS and my own experiences....
Thanks ^^..